Mother in the Mountains

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Parenthood

Personal Reflections for 2020

     motherinthemountains      1 Comment

I started the 2010 decade with a couple of rough years and I ended it with a couple of rough years. I don’t like to be vulnerable but I think it’s important to be transparent. The last decade was full of depression, anxiety, and disappointment. But I did have the best year of my life in the last decade – so far. 2020 is going to beat it.

mommy blogger faith at mother in the mountains

Change is hard for me

and in 2017 a lot of changes began to happen. My husband moved for work so we were in a long distant relationship from fall 2017 to spring 2018. I finished up my last few semesters of school while my girls (2 years and 6 months at the time) had to go to daycare for the first time. Then I interviewed and landed my first job out of the house in four years and then we moved, twice, in one summer.

Smack in the middle of that upheaval I started out with my baby. She was born in January of 2019. Even though she was unplanned and came at the most tumultuous of times, I know she came at the right time. Of course we ended up in the hospital with her and truly thought we were going to lose her for a horrific week.

After that, I stayed home for the next eleven months, just me and my three girls. Last year was full of adventures and fun but 2020 will be better.

2019

The calm after the storm and most days I was still trying to find my footing. I felt completely uprooted and off-kilter for a long time. I’m just now realizing how much I am still dealing with the emotions leftover from 2017/2018.

In the weeks before this new decade started I realized that I had too much left in my heart from the past. I spent a lot of time on reflections for 2020. There was little room for the present and no room for the future. I spent a lot of time thinking over the past few years; taking responsibility for my parts and forgiving others for their parts.

Personal Reflections for 2020

I have moved on. This decade will be full of the present looking forward to the future. I love remembering all the fun times but the past is not somewhere that I want to live.

My words for 2020 are forgiveness, presence, and patience.

The words I am going to carry with me into this next year are, “I can do all things through Christ.” Philippians 4:13

I am tired of being too busy, too sad, and too overwhelmed. Only I can determine how my future will be, I write my own story.

I’m excited to see what this year will bring and I hope you will follow along with me. I would love to hear some of your personal reflections for 2020 in the comments.I was lucky enough to be mentioned in these posts along with other great bloggers you should follow into this year.

xo

Faith

Small Babies: Three Ways to Battle Mom Guilt

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My baby is seven months old and she’s in the 1 percentile for growth. When I took her to the doctor’s for her six month checkup I had been aware that something wasn’t right. Because of this I had spent about a month trying – without success – to get her to take a bottle. I had already introduced her to solids, was breastfeeding as often as she wanted plus at least once per night, and was offering her baby crackers and snacks whenever possible.

Despite this, she hadn’t gained much weight from her four month to her six month check up.

And I blamed myself. I felt so horrible. I didn’t post any updates about her weight. It took me almost a month to do her six month photos because every time I looked at her I knew she didn’t look six months.

I get so many comments ‘how old is she? she looks three months!’ ‘wow, she’s so tiny!’ ‘she gets around for her age!’

image shows a small infant

Honestly, we still don’t know why she isn’t gaining weight. She’s meeting all of her milestones. She started reaching and babbling on time, she started rolling super early. She could sit at 6.5 months, got her first tooth, talks all the time, thinks anything on the floor is a good thing to taste, and is ridiculously tough. She’s all muscle – no fat.

I still breastfeed her whenever she wants – usually twice a night now. She eats three solid meals a day, whatever we’re eating quite honestly because she won’t take no for an answer. I try bottles, I try sippy cups, but she doesn’t want milk unless it comes straight from the tap.

Yet, I still find myself blaming myself. Something must be wrong with me. I’m not producing enough, I’m not feeding her fattening foods, I’m not making sure she gets enough solids, enough milk – enough.

I’m not enough.

But I’m doing everything I possibly can, what else could I do? I even have to take care of myself better. I eat every meal with her, trying to eat more than I actually want, I take fenugreek as often as I remember. I take alfalfa and make milk boosting cookies whenever I have the time.

tiny infant meeting milestones but causes mom guilt because of smallness

This mom guilt is insidious. It pops up when you least expect it. When she’s laughing because I’m tickling her belly and I notice she has no belly fat. It hurts me. What I wouldn’t do for a fat baby.

I’ve dealt with this before. My eldest never had any fat on her until she was over a year old. She’s perfectly healthy now so I know as long as we keep tabs on her weight and make sure she’s still meeting her milestones – long term she will be okay.

But at this moment in time I just feel guilty.

I don’t have any answers about how to get rid of mom guilt. I do know I don’t deserve to feel like this and I am intelligent enough to know that it isn’t my fault. I understand that she’s still healthy and happy, and that’s what is important. But still, the mom guilt. I do my best to push past it and focus on the now, focus on what I can do, but it doesn’t go away. The best solution I have are these steps

three steps to battle mom guilt

  1. Acknowledge my negative feelings. I allow myself to feel the guilt but I don’t allow myself to wallow in it. Feeling it motivates me to continue trying to remedy the problem but I don’t let it swallow me whole.
  2. Then I problem solve. I can feel awful about it but that doesn’t stop me from still doing my best and not giving up. Sometimes I’ll even write up a list to tackle the problem. Then break it down into goals. Then work on those goals.
  3. Finally, I let it go. If it’s not something that is going to cause severe problems and it’s something that’s entirely (or mostly) in my head – I have to let it go. I can’t fix this right now. I can’t change the past. I can’t do anything else but what I’m doing. So I put it on a mental shelf and worry about something else. I can come back to it later and throw the problem away – or solve it when I’m in a better head space.

At this point we don’t have any answers. We go back to the doctor’s soon. I’m considering trying formula because as of now I’ve only tried breast milk in the bottle. Not sure how that will work since she won’t even take juice out of a bottle but I’m willing to try anything.

But I do know that I’m doing my best. Mom guilt will come back, even after this problem is resolved. There’s always something we can feel guilty about. But I will fight and I will win.

I am doing my best and that’s all we can do.

xo

Faith

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Huggies Special Delivery a Review

     motherinthemountains      1 Comment

This is a sponsored post for SheSpeaks/Huggies®.

It’s been a crazy summer. We went to visit my mom for the second time last week. On the way we stopped and got Huggies® Special Delivery™ diapers because I didn’t want to pack the last dozen I had at home (it’s the worst to get home and find you have no diapers left). My mom’s is a 4 hour drive, after our mid-way pit stop and leg stretch Seren fell asleep and then pooped.

I was so sad when we got there and her poor bum was a little red. I almost grabbed the diaper ointment before we left but decided not to since it was going to only be a few days. Since I couldn’t do anything else, I cleaned her up and put on a Huggies® Special Delivery™ diaper. I was hoping it wouldn’t get worse until we got home. So I wouldn’t have to drive the forty minutes to a store. It only took about two diaper changes before the rash was completely gone.

Huggies® Special Delivery™ diapers are hypoallergenic, have no harsh ingredients, and are dermatologist tested. They are also scent-free (I really dislike the fake baby scent of some diapers) and elemental chlorine-free. This is the exact reason I only use Huggies® diapers in the first year for all of my babies. I’ve never had long-lasting diaper rashes with Huggies® and rarely have to use any type of cream.

I love how soft and thin they are. They never take up much space in our travel bags. Which is good because do you know how many diapers you have to pack when you travel? I know because we go somewhere at least every other month.

When I heard about Huggies® Special Delivery™ diapers, I was really excited to hear that they are the softest plant-based* diaper. It’s just as important to not leave forever waste as to not take too much from the earth without giving back.

Turns out, I have a lot of feelings about diapers. Huggies® is the brand I always reach for at the store. You can find these at Walmart in the diaper section on the endcap or Click here to shop for Huggies® Special Delivery™ at Walmart.com.

*23% by weight

xo

Faith

Children’s Books about Math

     motherinthemountains      2 Comments

Teaching kids to love reading is super important but it’s not the only thing kids should love to learn about. Math is usually the least favorite subject of most students which is super unfortunate. This dislike is often formed when a child enters school but a positive relationship can be created earlier with good books and a better attitude.

Numbers are often feared and ignored because we don’t understand how they work. Instead of introducing complicated rules quickly and aggressively, numbers should be integrated as something that is necessary and helpful. Today I’m recommending a few books that will help your child create a good relationship with numbers – before they realize math is “supposed” to be hard.

A Second is a Hiccup by Hazel Hutchins

four girls reading book together on swing

This book is the perfect introduction about time and how it passes. The story progresses from how a second is a hiccup to 60 hiccups in an hour all the way to 12 months in a year. It ends with, “you will be loved – as surely as a second is a hiccup.” So it’s not only educational but adorable. This book can be introduced as early as you’d like. It’s easy to understand and introduces the concept of time in a fun way.

The Grapes of Math by Greg Tang

three girls reading book on swing

This book is full of fun math riddles. It can easily be read without tackling the abstract concepts before kids are ready to really discuss numbers. Even though the concepts are a little advanced it can be read to younger children as a great introduction to numbers. With an older child (5-7) the concepts can be learned independently or an adult can help with understanding the riddles. All the answers are in the back of the book which is very helpful.

Lift the Flap Times-Tables

child reading Times Tables book while lying down

This Usborne book is a little more advanced than the others I’ve recommended. It’s a good book for kindergartners to have access to but most kids won’t really begin to explore and understand until 1st or 2nd grade. This is a fun book for kids to play with and helps them independently explore numbers.

Introducing number and math books early and often can build a good foundation for kids to build on. Creating a good relationship with math is important for every kid. It’s a shame that most people don’t understand that math can be fun, entertaining, and creative. Instead most people think math is something to learn and forget as quickly as possible. Hopefully these books help you create a good relationship between your child and math.

We’re so glad you’re following along our Read With Friends train. Don’t forget to check out the next post by Nell Curran all about potty training!

xo

Faith

Faith: Twenty-Five Facts/Stories About Me

     motherinthemountains      2 Comments

To celebrate my birthday today I got together with my five sisters and my mom to come up with 25 fun stories about myself. I also asked a couple friends to contribute. So here’s 25 things about me that aren’t boring like my favorite color:

  1. She was always very secretive. – Mom
  2. She has a knee slapper sense of humor. – Sister
  3. She, 4′ 11″ slight framed, once was suspected by a cop of kidnapping two full grown males and her little sister. – Sister (long story short)
  4. Faith would literally drive four hours and pee her pants before using a public bathroom. – Husband
  5. She collects tea pots and fossil boxes.
  6. She grows her nails out really, really long. – Sister
  7. She can type like 700 hundred words per minute. – Sister (exaggeration)
  8. She likes to visit cemeteries when she travels. – Husband
  9. She does not like feet. – Mom
  10. Faith would rather let chocolate sit forever and go hard rather than share it. She hoards chocolate. – Everyone (I’m not this bad anymore!)
  11. She wears the cutest clothes that look so comfy. – Sister
  12. She’s a party planner, she started our family tradition of an annual party. – Sister and mom
  13. She’s like my therapist. – Sister
  14. Her numbers and letters have colors. Certain numbers are bad numbers because of their colors. – Husband
  15. When she went skinny dipping someone was watching her so I told her “put your clothes on!” but she ignored me. – Sister
  16. She was always really bossy to her little brothers and sisters since she was so responsible. She was clean and always had everything organized and made everyone keep things clean. She would make lunch without being asked and have everyone do their jobs. – Mom
  17. She used to go with her little brother to the lake and have lunch and they’d be gone a long time just exploring. – Mom
  18. We went through the drive through at Taco Bell and they gave us free drinks. It didn’t dawn on either of us that he was flirting until we told her husband. – Sister
  19. So I don’t know if you’ll remember this, but when we were younger and you’d come out to the farm I remember you calling me “the little girl with the bump on her hand”. I had a bible bump thing on my wrist and that’s how you’d remember me, probably because my name is so different and hard to remember. – Lovina
  20. If she’s talking to someone else and you try to talk to her then she will ignore you. She will not talk to you until she is finished talking to the first person. – Sister
  21. She graduated high school early. – Mom
  22. She came up with making beet raspberry jam and putting gelatin in it and it was the best jam we’ve ever made – Mom
  23. One time we went to go to Jimmie Johns and she goes to pull in and she pulls onto the grass. The people across the street busted out laughing so I yelled at her to get off the grass. She had to pull out and go around the building to park. – Sister
  24. After she got her wisdom tooth out she bawled the whole thirty minute drive home because she wanted a stupid milkshake – Mom
  25. We would stay up late drinking pomegranate 7up and eating peanut m&ms and getting super hyper. – Friend

xo

Faith

Quick and Fun Rhyming Books

     motherinthemountains      4 Comments

Rhymes – Foundation for Reading

A stack of rhyming books I found in our shelves!

Today we’re going to talk about rhyming books! American Academy of Pediatrics has a list of five R’s that outline different ways to encourage early learning. The second R is Rhyming. Rhymes encourage phonemic awareness which builds the foundation for when children begin to learn the written word. Basically this means that being able to hear and make rhymes is a key to later being able to read and write rhymes (and other words, of course)!

Being able to hear that cat, bat, and rat all have the same ending sound introduces them to patterns and word families. This is important because reading is not something that just suddenly happens, it builds from a combination of many skills. Rhyming is an important skill that is vital to learning to read.

Furthermore, rhyming books are fun – they introduce fun word play to young kids that encourages them to continue reading.  Rhythm is something people can hear and feel, even if they don’t understand, and it helps with memorization and keeps the reader engaged. If children enjoy the books they are introduced to at a young age, they’re more likely to enjoy reading later on. It’s important not only to lay the foundation of reading skills but to also build a love of reading.

She can’t read but she can pretend!

Recommendations

I’m recommending a couple of our favorite rhyming picture books today. Most everyone knows that the brain develops faster in the first few years than any other time in a person’s life; it is never too early to start learning. These books are quick to read (good for small attention spans) and fun for parents to read (so you’ll be mostly okay after the hundredth time reading them). There are a lot of popular rhyming books, Dr. Seuss pops into most people’s heads when you ask them to think of one but we like to branch out. Here’s a couple of our favorite rhyming books and some of the reasons why we love them.

Jamberry by Bruce Degan

Jamberry is a nonsensical, enjoyable ride filled with all types of berries. The illustrations show the characters picking many types of berries throughout the story. The words simply describe what the picture illustrates, with fun, rhyming language. It’s quick and easy and Sonnet has started to memorize what each page says.

Chicka Chicka Boom Boom by Bill Martin Jr

She likes to stack every book she can find and ‘read’ them all.

This is another one that’s fun to read aloud! I tend to try to find books that are fun or interesting to read aloud, otherwise I struggle to want to read to my girls. Chicka Chicka Boom Boom follows the abc’s on their trek to get to the top of the coconut tree. It’s fun, quick, and introduces kids to rhyming and letters!

Rhyming Dust Bunnies by Jan Thomas

She thought this book was pretty silly

Rhyming Dust Bunnies is all about rhymes, these dust bunnies only rhyme! Except Bob, he breaks the mold by saying other words (spoiler, he’s trying to warn everyone!). This is the shortest book but still lots of fun. This book specifically lets the reader know that they are reading about rhymes.

So there’s our top three favorite rhyming books! I love reading them to my girls and I’m always happy when they pick them out from the bookshelf. This post is part of a series of blog posts: Books with Friends! If you enjoyed this one, check out yesterdays post by Leah Frances. Her post is about a fun folktale based in Africa and it’s definitely worth a read.

Mufaro’s Beautiful Daughters, A Folktale from Zimbabwe by John Steptoe

xo

Faith

PS Shout out to my mom and aunt Cathy at Building Lifelong Readers for generously sharing their teacher knowledge about writing.

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